The Bush--Blair Trial.. and the Lord Justice himself.
Original date:-October 2004}
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Jesus C..Ph.D..AMI Mech E..P Eng..M.D..Torah Scholar(Grade 5).
Why only Grade 5...See Here
Prosecution and Investigative Committee.
Matthew.. CFR....Council For Religions.
Timothy Sebastian.. once BBC's HardTalk devils advocate...and rottweiler breeder.
Witnesses for the Prosecution.(if called)
M.Gibson...with original tapes,
John Paul II (on loan).With hard copy transcripts.
C.Powell ... with nothing but a disingenuous look on face.
Yasser Arafat...Special appearance and looking healthy.
Bibles ... Old and New Testaments..(no BabylonianTalmud).
Vlad Putin ... The heart and soul of Mr Bush's worst dilemma.But its all in the eyes apparently.
Jacques Chirac...Tony Blair's straight man and court jester.
O.bin Laden ....Scrolls in hand,steps outside his Qumran cave complex Israel....CCTV supplied by G.Tenet Enter Prizes
Ms Valerie Plame and Mr Joseph Wilson..in dark glasses and portfolios under arms.
Charged with crimes against Humanity.
A.Sharon..G.W.Bush ..D.Rumsfeld...C Rice....A.Blair ..R.Cheney..ADL's Abe Foxman.. and Jack(Sandy) Shaw.(aka..the singer)
Charged with aiding and abetting Torture..Murder and Crimes against Humanity.US Media....Print...Visual...Audio.
Congressional Communist Cabala (CCC)......Wolfowitz-Rhode-Rove-Feith-Ledeen-Perle -Pipes-Bolton-Abrams-Zakheim-Luti-Maloof-Negropante-Frum-Chertoff-Woolsey-Libby-Kissinger and Madonna ...with a bunch of Brits yet to be formally indicted.
John.Ashcroft..with recently amended Southern Bibles in both hands sitting alone, looking for Bare Naked Ladies on the Basilica walls (Talmud in back pocket)..
New World Orderlies and protagonists -P.Robertson -W.Graham Jr - Jack Van Impe - J Falwell ... And others not in good standing in THE BIG BLACK BOOK
Note!...'President' Saddam Hussein is being tried on another circuit...by Mr.Mohammed(peace be with him)...see Al Geezer's live telecast from Babylon ... 'The Hanging Gardens'..RIP...(Back)
Coverage... British Broadcasting Corporation.
Colour Commentators and guests of Jesus.....David Frost and Peter Mansbridge(CBC)...with honorary Main Stream Internet Architects and Truthsayers...Messrs...Jeff Rense-Joe Vialls-Justin Raimondo-St Clair-Alex Cockburn-the Watsons-Alex Jones(??)-Truthout-John Pilger.Mike Rivero and many more stalwarts of truth and democracy.
Venue..St Peters..The Basilica ..Rome.
Time..9.11 am....25th December 2005.
Security...G.Tenet Investigative Enter-Prizes and Fred the security man from Wal-mart .
Matthew..(with big black book in hand).
"Please do not RISE when the Lord Justice enters..To reciprocate is not necessary,or to late for some.....We will conduct these proceedings with dignity,respect and truth....Mr. Foxman please put away that Talmudic dictionary.. Thankyou ".
Jesus.. (enters the Basilica Conferencing room looking up and admiring the ceiling)."Thank you Matthew my friend for breaking the ice for me.. I find it most difficult to believe that all our efforts and pain may have been for naught.. However, I see in this room, some goodness in all that stand before me,even if they themselves do not....I have been informed by go(o)d sources that these proceedings will last six days,the seventh will be judgement day...I bring greetings and blessings from all that have tread this worldly earth in past years and they ask that you may remember them, their faces and their families.....I would like firstly to question the accused religious order before me .....
Mr. Roberts!,Can you tell the people present(and BBC viewers) as to why you and your 50 million...dare I say it, "Christian following" find the need to disrespect the righteous thinking of those that think that Commercialised Religion is a wrong...and is a personal decision left between them and the very same father of who we all belong."
Robertson..(Knuckles absolutely white with fear).
"Sir,I...your honour,Rabbi..your highness,I..your Lordship...I am shocked and in awe of your presence.I have..I have...I will...?(sits down with head in hands) "
"Bloody Plagiarism...Get your foot out of your mouth Roberto and tell the truth..Foxman!,I'll burn that bloody dictionary of yours by the end of the day if I see that thing again"
Matthew( also interrupts).
"Mr Rumsfeld...please be seated..You should know that the Lord Justice knows that you know that he knows you know what he knows you know...so please sit down until such time as the Lord calls you" (Rummy goes quite pale hearing the last few words)...
Well then.....You Mr Falwell..Can you explain why you would tell the media that the best thing for all of them was to purge the Muslim people from the surface of the earth..Why would a "Christian" advocate such inhumane measures..Did you not know that the Lord Justice daily plays poker and ping pong with Mr Mohammed.(peace be with him)"
Falwell (with Israeli contracts still sticking out of top pocket).
"No we didn't my Lord....It was his idea(pointing to Karl Rove)...He promised us that smearing would be accepted in your daddies Kingdom my Lord and we could be your Real Estate agents when you came back to visit us here on Earth...It was even subjected to a dem..demo..democ democratic vote sir(Bush looks puzzled) and only one abstained sir .(looking at Ashcroft)."
Jesus (seeing for the very first time the really meaning of chutzpa and naivete)
"Make a tree good and its fruit will be good,make a tree bad and its fruit will be bad, for a tree is recognized by its fruit...Can you remember that one Matthew in the good old days .(Foxman shaking his head ,trying to confirm Jesus's quote from the Talmud)
Okay Matthew, I think Messrs. Roberts and Falwell are a little overawed by the proceedings so I would ask Mr Sebastian to take the lead here...Your platform Timothy ..I think I have said that before somewhere too"
Sebastian (with rottweiler grin on face)
Thank you Jesus...Question to Bush and Blair..Why did you find it necessary to go back to the book of biblical thinking and call yourself born again Christians(sorry mul-Lord) and think that the Ten Commandments were some form of quasi/nazi pre-emptive military strike laws..How did you sleep at night when Iraqi,Afghanistani and Palestinian children were being torn to pieces by your idea of retribution and revenge...Why did you lie to the whole world very openly so that these people die horrible deaths...Why are you now stacking new lies upon old ...WHY WHY ???..Listen here Mr Bush to this 10 year old English boy of Irish/Scot parents 'Declan Galbraith'(now 17 years old) as he is also asking the very same question..Can you Blair..Cheney.. Rumsfeld..Rice..and Shaw answer his question'........Jesus is very much impressed by Sebastian's 'stoned'-face question here..He knows exactly the weight of questioning old tablets can be..Old Mo' the mountaineer told him
Tell Me Why
In my dream,children sing
A song of love for every boy and girl
The sky is blue and fields are green:
And laughter is the language of the world
Then i wake and all i see
Is a world full of people in need
Tell me why(why) does it have to be like this?
Tell me why (why) is there something i have missed?
Tell me why (why) cos i don't understand
When so many need somebody
We don't give a helping hand Tell me why?
Everyday i ask myself
What will i have to do to be a man?
Do i have to stand and fight
To prove to everybody who i am?
Is that what my life is for
To waste in a world full of war?
tell me why? tell me why?
tell me why? tell me why?
just tell me why, why, why?
Tell me why ..why,why,does the tiger run
Tell me why..why why do we shoot the gun
Tell me why..why,why do we never learn
Can someone tell us why we let the forest burn?
why,why do we say we care
Tell me why..why,why do we stand and stare
Tell me why..why,why do the dolphins cry
Can some one tell us why we let the ocean die?
why..why if we're all the same
Tell me why..why,why do we pass the blame
Tell me why..why,why does it never end
Can some one tell us why we cannot just be friends?
(The Mass Media hides their faces in their hands..Madonna's thinking how can she get her hands on this kid..Putin tears up..Falwell and Ashcroft thinks one of the Angels has falling from the ceiling..and Sharon thinks he REALLY is dead and in heaven why..why.)
(Sebastion continues).."While you're pondering these problems without the aide of your embattled leaky neoconvicts.... why blame others for your criminal rabid delinquency..
Furthermore Mr Bush,the mind must filter logic prior to the surge of neuronic instruction to the tongue,else ..Let me remind you (quotes Bush)..'Free nations are peaceful nations..Free nations don't attack each other..Free nations don't develope weapons of mass destruction.'.(end quote) .As the leader of over 290 million people, a 'roving' statement as such is detrimental to the sanity of us all.You have demonstrated without ambiguity to all, that indeed the American people are not free...You said it Mr Bush..not I......A statement like that could not have been any more ridiculous if your script-man(leaky Rove) had thrown all the syllables and punctuation into the air and copied the final result."
Bush (with smearing sneer on face..taught by the method man Karl Rove )
"Moving video Timothy..very moving..I would like to correct you Mr Prophet as
Continue with the reading here..
being on a one to one relationship basis with the Lord Justice's daddy(Jesus shields face with hand), I have it on good authority that if you go to Church every other Sunday and watch the Jack Van Impe hour,that automatically qualifies you as a Chrisssss (word will not come out of mouth).....I find your question regarding little children being torn to pieces somewhat exaggerated and lacking in faith...Faith in the US of A's engineering capabilities and accuracy of our intelligence and fine weapons...available to all Dictators and /or Heads of State that may be having trouble with their citizens.
Now as far as the lies are concern..If you read Floyd(he means Freud) and Strauss(great musician George thinks)and a couple of recent Rummies booklets on 'How the mind preserves the lie'(he means perceives the lie...or does he??),you may be surprised to learn Mr Prophet that once a lie is embedded, as we say in the media ops room(sniggers then casually adjusts implant), it stays there until another similiar lie replaces it..Its got its own little room so to speak(Condi nods in agreement..Putin shades eyes with hand..)
From that Mr Prophet sir, we ennaddverently(sic)been able to establish that by bombarding so to speak, the empty brain,(stops abruptly,stares into space..Rove coughs loudly)...Uuh..
we can even feed in true facts but the brain will not have sufficient time to tinguish(sic) the lie from the truth...So I put it to you Mr Prophet,are we feeding them lies or telling them the truth"...(Rumsfeld applauds loudly and Cheney whacks him in the ear with his latest cheque from Haliburton..it hurt)
To infor on Saddam's Trial
Sebastian (stone faced)
"Mr Bush,I am not a Prophet..I work for the BBC.....Normally, whenever I interview people, I always play the 'devil's advocate'....I find it quite chilling and yet exhilarating speaking to the advocator himself....I respectfully suggest that you finish the children's book that you were reading on 11th September Mr Bush, before investigating the Straussian Principles of Systemic Sinners and Their Profit Motives.
Thank you Mr Bush...Now Mr Blair,you once said that Mr Saddam Hussein exterminated over 400,000 of his own people and buried them in mass graves.... You also sa...."
Jesus (admirably showing no signs of bias)
"Mr Foxman,if I hear that word 'chickenfeed' or 'smallfry' again I will have Mr Tenet escort you to the 'chambers' (Foxman smiles knowingly)..Thank you Mr Foxman....Proceed Timothy."
Sebastian (throws notes onto floor)
"Thank you My Lord.....Mr Blair,you also said that Saddam gassed his own people,yet the CIA disavows having said or even hinted to this,knowing that it was not the mustard gas that Rumsfeld gave to Saddam that killed the Kurds.....but the phosgene gas filled artillery shells Mr Bush's daddy gave to Iran...Moreover,not to dis-similiar to that which Winston Churchill dropped on the very same people during WW1(George falls off bench)....Now coming back to the 400,000,apparently there seems to be one hell..excuse me My Lord.. of a discrepancy on what has been identified and itemised so far and that which have been trumpeted by the SAME 'excellent sources' that informed you and Mr Bush about Yellowcake,Ricen,all that bio-stuff not forgetting WMD,robot planes,chem trucks with supplied footage and photographs.... and of course, the Al Quaeda link...Do you deny saying that these 'facts' were indisputable
Blair (starting to crack already)
"It was George's fault..I told him what Scott Ritter and a whole bunch of ex-CIA blokes,the Internet and other professionals were saying..But he was so hooked on the Robertson's idea that the Lord Justice would call in to see us if we listened to Sharon's delinquent disciples..Rove-Rice-Cheney-Rumsfeld-Feith-Pipes-Black-Frum-Bolton-Perle-Wolf-and-witch and the rest of the ragtrade...But he wouldn't listen to me (Thinks..I can't lie here..cos HE is here..yikes).. You can't blame me for all that stuff that George's daddy was throwing around the world at discounted and disgusting prices..It wasn't my fault...It wasn't my fault...It wasn't my fault...It wasn't my fault".(Colin Powell hands Tony a glass of water)...It was your bloody fault Colin with all that satellite and military porn and bullshi....(looks at the Lord ..and stops abruptly..Jesus smiles as a sign of hope.)"
Jesus (still smiling).
"John Paul...Do you have a sense that our ultimate adversary is present and attempting to highjack these proceedings"
John Paul (another wonderful smile).
"He is indeed in our presence My Lord... and in many forms..I think Mr Gibson and Matthew would attest to that My Lord.."
Jesus (looking picture perfect).
"Mr Gibson...Excellent movie mate... and as JP said "It is as it was"... I should
know and yes it did hurt........What do you think we should do to eliminate the presence of evil in this gathering"
Mel Gibson (questionably glaring toward the horde of accused and numerous fleeting dark shadows).
"Remove Ariel Sharon and Karl Christian Rove from the room My Lord ???"
Jesus (very sad look on face at the mention of Rove's full name).
"Ah yes..I hear what you are saying...Can any man in this courtroom come to the defense of these two men.....(absolute long silence)......Indeed, this brings back many many memories...Again, I ask for the voice of one man that can attest to the character of these men.... (the burning Bush comes forward)...Yes Mr Bush,do you believe everything these man did ,to be honourable and in the interest of whole mankind.....Please..."
Bush (still with smearing sneer on face and now the manic snigger..also
taught by the leaky squeaky method man Karl Rove ). "Of course I do your honour(respect for Jesus slowly ebbing )..I trust those men..They are good men...They are decent men...They are honourable men...They got me back into office didn't they..Well them, Diebold and a couple of kindergarten fibs that I know your daddy ignores"
Jesus (now with first worried look on face).
"Sorry for that digression Timothy....carry on"
Sebastian (thinks..what power!! Jesus has).
"My pleasure my Lord...Mr Blair..you will notice that I have in my hand here, a letter..A letter provided by our Lord..at least mine..He picked it up this morning from Dr David Kelly's office and would be grateful if you would read it to the court"...(Tony faints..Tim smiles for first time..George is looking puzzled..Tenet grabs Tony's ankles and drags him out of the courtroom...assisted by Fred,the Wal-Mart security guy).
Jack Shaw (jumping to his feet).
"Its all a lie,its all a lie I tell you..I'm not taking the rap for that little dosie...We told him that Kelly was too sound in mind to bump himself off..His religion wouldn't permit it... Another new one My Lord,...But NO, Little Anthony thought that he knew all the amen corners ever since he came back from the US of A ... Walking around like a Roman Gladiator for a week he was.(Jesus is not amused)".
Abe Foxman (looking for an opportunity..any).
"I told you it had nothing to do with our Mossad didn't I..But No..nobody believes this guy do they.....At least no one outside of Congress".
Top of page
Jesus (Parental look on face).
My son...I believe you..I believe that everything you say,you believe..Now will you please refrain from waving that Talmudic Torture Text and take your seat and Timothy Sebastian will get to you in due time..You are upsetting John Paul and Mr Gibson...thankyou Mr Foxman...I just realised Abraham,you have an Arabic name...very interesting,very interesting indeed" (Foxman has convinced himself that Jesus is beginning to set him up for the big-drop)
Sebastian (Waiting for Tony to recover)
"Since you are now on your own feet and very much visible Mr Shaw,can you tell the court ANYTHING regarding John Scarlett and the memo he sent to Downing Street for Prime Minister Blair's attention regarding "full intelligence update", months before you killed all those little children in Iraq...What sought of intelligence was needed for you and old Rumsfeld to deliberately and callously rip the bodies apart of so many innocent people...Did you sleep that night."
Straw (looking undecidely at Rumsfeld).
"I never have trouble sleeping...We all knew that Bush,Cheney and Sharon had already filled in their personal dairies..But what could we do..The Pentagon was threatening not to send our quota of anti-bio medicines and the Mossad was breathing down our necks for they were tired and exhausted false-flagging everyone in God's Kingdom(Jesus smiles)and scheming their little black-op hearts out..They wanted results."
Sebastian (looking intensely at Sharon,Wolfowitz,Rove and Feith).
"All righttty then..Shaw you are accused (Jesus deepens his brow)..I mean excused...Mr Sharon to the stand please.
Mr Sharon,do you and Mr Bush have any idea what you are doing to the people of this world..Do you not think that you should talk to those that do not see everything your way...Do you not regard human life, beit Jew or Arab, both precious and equal...Did you not seek any truth and honesty in your escapades around God's little acre(Jesus smiles)..Do you not get upset and sad when you see little children blown to pieces or shot through their tiny heads ..or when Jewish and Muslim children are taught hate and vengeance in school at the tender age of five..Did you not have a guilty conscience when sending all those young Americans to do your dirty work..Does it not occur to you that the very people and countries that you so desperately want to destroy,Iraq and Iran...are the very same that provided you with your original ancestors Abraham and Moses..Well Mr Sharon".
Sharon (Looking like Gibson's 'Devils Shadow')
Jesus (sighs deeply).
"Mr Sharon..Sir....What can I say..There are very few people that your and my God refuses entry to..
God has a book..a black book..After these hearings, I can see him sending me down to Wal-Mart for another one..Why do you refuse to love others the way you love your grand-daughter..There is no better feeling..There is no difference..There is no excuse and there are many precedents.
I may have created anxiety and anguish with your and my ancestors.The message remains the same...If you see someone in need,then tend to them with all the human interest and compassion they want, for they will be there when you are feeling sick and maybe unwanted..You are no longer a young man Mr Sharon.....Furthermore Mr Sharon,I do not like shopping at Wal-Mart anyway."
Sharon (Glows with understanding).
"I hear what you are saying Jesus"...(Foxman bites on his Talmud..Arafat punches fist in air..Cheney winces..Falwell rips up Israeli contracts and Bush utters quietly 'That's my man up there').
Jesus (Showing strong sense of hope).
"Thankyou Mr Sharon..and may your and my,the very same God see you in better circumstances".
Sebastian (amazed at Jesus's sense of persuasion).
"Would Ms Rice take the stand please...Thankyou.
Ms Rice, are you not a very religious person..Do you not attend Mr Ashcroft morning Bible class..every morning....(Note the psychological ambiguity in Brit english)..Do you cross your fingers when you tell a lie,even a little one like being surprised, as was old Rumsfeld, when you said.. ' Who would think of using airliners as missiles to crash into buildings'..Furthermore, why did you call on the 10th September the Los Angeles Mayor.. Davis I think his name was ...not to fly on 911.
Why are so many so-called Christians(Jesus and Matthew beams)seemingly not following the biographical writings of the Lord Justice rulings...and what makes you think that you can wander around the world bribing and threatening those that do not believe that real Christianity is a sham..Sorry about that my Lord but that is precisely what Ms Rice has been doing these last three years...Well Rice.."
Condi Rice(very much looking like Gibson's devil in the cemetery )
"I don't think they dislike me..The people in Europe loved what I had to say..They even provided me with some new costumes and their makeovers and makeup are so trendy and modern..They were more civilised than I expected and much more attentive in what my husband..Oooops sorry, Mr Bush had to say..I even met with the Palestinian guy..what's his name...Abba ??
As far as the crashing planes are concerned,I was told that Saddam must have been
training those hijackers for years and Mr Powell confided that he thought that he was being used by Mr Sharon and my sugardaddy,I mean Mr Bush, to use his knowledge of geography to set-up the graphics for the invasion..He was very good wasn't he..Hope I am that good when the time comes to attack Ira--..I mean to attach a plan.
Regarding the Mayor..Well, it was he that called me on the 10th September and asked if he should fly..and I said no..NOT as you were insinuating and besides I don't tell deliberate lies if the occasion calls for it...".
(Powell smiles in amusement...Bush scrubs her off his till 2020AD list pending amdts 21/22 and Sebastian looks bemused yet fully understanding the confusion in her mind)
Jesus(Scratches head and thinks,haven't I seen this face before).
"Condoleezza....Ms Rice..my dear..We have been through our communication prayer records for "The Fellowship" for the past 1000 entries and it appears that you have not spoken(prayed) to anyone at all..not even Matthew here..No offense Mat...The last entry for The Fellowship was a one hour stint by a gentleman named "Hitler" on the 25th December 1944..Is Mr Hitler a friend of yours Ms. Rice.
Do you wish to rekindle the truth of your testimony and tell Mr Sebastian again, as to whether you really attended the Ashcroft Anarchists Hour at Mr Bush's home..the White House...We are after all attempting to find out the truth(Foxman looks in Talmud again), as to whether or not I was prematurely called back to a world that is lacking ,it appears, in intelligence, FREEDOM,love and humility and seemingly, again needing my ministry.".(P.Robertson..W.Graham Jr..Jack Van Impe and J Falwell all looking very very redundant,while Foxman braces himself,yet fearing the challenge).
Condi Rice (looking very dull in one of Mrs Bush's two-piece costumes..sharing of course)
"I find it quite disconcerting when my integrity is being challenged SIR..At first, it was not our intentions to call on you SIR.....Mr Rumsfeld knew that those drop-
outs had already contacted Mr Mohammed through the Indigo email system and we were depending on Indigo to inform us of such a move..Alas, they didn't... (Condi has forgotten that Jesus has a Ph.D in Mind Reading and Reverse Speech Therapy..however..Michael Moore moves in for a close-up shot,Gibson directing)...Sir,I 'lie' for no man,except my President sir..."
Jesus (Reads mind..smiles awkwardly and glances at Bush...and Laura in audience)
"Dear dear Lady.....Mr Ashcroft or Mr Tenet, at the rear of the courtroom here , MUST have told you and your colleges that Mr Mohammed and I share the very same
email address firstname.lastname@example.org.. I think that Mo.(peace be with him) would have mentioned it had The Fellowship, or as you say, Rumsfeld's 'dropouts' attempted to contact us..
Of course it may have landed up in the hate file..I mean Spam File..That be the case,it is automatically transferred to Old Nick's burning bin at email@example.com.. (Bush wisps out address book)
Could it be that your friend Mr Hitler may have received your 'prayers' instead...Possibly by mistake?:(Jesus always ends on a positive and hopeful note)
Sebastian (smiling like a pit-bull).
"Thank you my Lord.. I will call on Ms Rice again if the occasion should ever again warrant it...I would like Mr Rumsfeld to take the stand..Thank you..
No Mr Rumsfeld you do not need to swear on the Bible..The author happens to be in front of you waiting for you to talk to him,you know"....(Rummy freezes ..paralyzed and rigid with fear).
Jesus (knows what Rummy knows... already).
"Timothy,are you sure that the OLD man is okay.Does he know where he is and whether knowing what he knows, past or present, could be detrimental to his health...I am somewhat SHOCKED at knowing that such old men still strive for knowledge in this the 21st century(AD of course)..Matthew get him a glass of water for I fear that he may also be in AWE of these proceedings"
Old Rumsfeld (finally coming to)
"Get-off me will you...I don't need any more help..I know when help is required..Knowing when to help and knowing if help is necessary is like knowing if the known could be the un-known or the known..so there..[Shuush..See here]
Now will someone get me the press question and answer list please..Lets get this show on the road...Where's the guy from Fox or CNN..... and I expect Myers is late again"
Sebastian (Finally he has Rummy in front of him)
"Donald..over here...over here...Thankyou Donald".
Old Rumsfeld (Looking at the new kid on the block)
"You will have to take your turn Limey..Where is that Fox guy gone..Okay, I know ,I know what is happening here..Where's Myers when you want to know something that is not known . Okay Mr Limey what do you want to know..be brief ".
Sebastian (looking at the sad figure he once admired)
"Mr Rumsfeld sir....What do you know..What do you know sir about the instruments of torture used on innocent prisoners and the bombing of innocent peoples of Iraq and lest we forget, the Afghani people,with ammunitions that are outlawed by all in this World that you take so much for granted."
Old Rumsfeld (fiddling with his notes and looking around for Myers)
" I can't see that question down here ..Are you sure you are on the right page Limey..(Myers is still not beside him) ..Okay,I know...Off the top of my head I would say that you are presuming these Iraqi drifters are innocent and yet they haven't had the chance to see a judge and a jury you know. And you Limey wants to leave them go..from Gitmo..ooh no mate.....Are you forgetting that we have already applied for the get out of jail free card and exception for one year on ALL Americans caught doing nasty little things to your 'innocent prisoners'..
that's an oxymoron if ever there was one mate...I don't need our Mr Rodriguez(sic) to tell me that I am right..I am always right,always right...never left..always right (Slow glance to the side, but Myers is still not beside him).......Those bombs were left overs and besides they don't always go off unless some stupid Iraqi touches them of course...When I know that we know what the truth holds we accept those knowns...I will knowingly accept nothing less than the truth Mr SABBATICAL,nothing less..Does that answer your questions..Can I go now Limey "
Sebastian (neck and ears red with anger,fermenting,yet composed..Then an opening appears)
"YOU CAN"T HANDLE THE TRUTH MR RUMSFELD" You would not recognise it if it bit you on the as*(Jesus coughs loudly just in time..Tim settles back down)....I think it was sometime in early 2002 that you said to the Press(with large "P" ..literally) that you were establishing a, (quote) 'Dis-Information Ministry'.. Then shortly afterward you indicated that it was all just a hoax...Which one was the lie Mr Rumsfall, as I am confident that Fox News(sic)..CNN..NY Times(throwing up) and Washington Post are STILL very confused....MR RUMSFALL."
Old Rumsfeld (squints eyes to remember..leans over microphone..Brain really in gear now)
"Are you sure that was me..Let me see now..I know,I know ...Actually.. MR SABBATICAL isn't it??..... I inadvertently(Bush writes word in his 'use on Mondays' entry dairy) mis-spoke at that crucial moment..I let the cat out of the bag so to speak..Recovery is the essence to survival my pappy used to say before my Aspartame took him away(Rummy is actually telling the truth about his pappy..Jesus confirms statement)...
If I remember correctly, I also mentioned something about and showed film of our exploding MOAB (mother of all bombs) which actually was still on the drawing board..
You cannot call them lies..Lies are used to hurt people.(Powell lowers head,Bush smiles and Cheney nods..but note that Rummy has already set-up his next killer sound bite )..So Mr Sabbatical, since we did not really have the bomb, how the hell can we hurt anyone..By empirical deductive analysis(Bush puts dairy back into pocket) how in hell's name can that be a lie".(Jesus thinks 'Old Nick' is in the room somewhere)
Jesus (realising this guy is good.. very good)
"Mr Rumsfeld,are you aware that you are attempting to re-write the book on truth..I also saw George Orwell's '1984' in 1964 on BBC and should warn you..No no, that is much to strong ..I will just say one word...'Plagiarism' Mr Rumsfeld.. plagiarism.. (Michael Ledeen goes white and flips out)..
Donald old chap,if your ever get to meet this 'Mr Hitler', I think he would be most annoyed at your Iraqi and WW2 comparison of his 'Werwolf' and your 'group of dead-enders' (Donald wonders how the hell ..no...how in heaven name does Jesus know this resistance organization from September 1944).....If you ever again get stuck for words Mr Rumsfeld,just give Matthew,Mark,Luke or John a call.I am sure they will steer you toward the 'Truth with Words'..my latest book from Bantam Publishing House next month..Cost is free to all Government officials and Politicians"(Foxman scoffs and caresses his Talmud)
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Jesus (now adjourning for the day..To be continued next week)
"My children..ALL OF YOU.....We have started on a long journey..The road is fraught with danger..We must all bare our own cross,for that is the nature of our World.. Whatsoever cometh from these trials and tribulations will be decided by the People of our Race(POOR)..the human race... with thanks of course to the advancements in your pop-up-phone-in telephone and satellite technologies.(Powell tries to hide his face and shame...bin Ladin scowls..Sharon tears up Chinese contracts...)
When you leave this courtroom tonight, I trust that, be you the people of God or those for whom God is always near..you will provide comfort and compassion for those that suffers the agonies of our errors and mistakes.For they are the ONLY reason why we are here today..May God go with you and guides your footsteps..
All Righttty then Matthew and Timothy. Where is this 'McDonalds' you guys are always talking about..Lets break some bread so to speak...I'm famished."
Meanwhile still inside the courtroom...
Wolfowitz-Rhode-Rove-Feith-Ledeen-Perle-Pipes-Bolton-Abrams-Zakheim-Luti-Maloof-Negropante-Frum-Chertoff-Woolsey-Libby-Kissinger and Madonna still all chained together(with the - sign) are being shipped back to their holding cells....in Gitmo...Now under the Command and Control of Putin's Poor People ....all with extremely long memories.
Sharon-Bush-Rumsfeld-Blair-Shaw all shuffle off to waiting plane bound for the Abu Ghraib Resort Iraq, Unaware as to the reception they will encounter..
Condi Rice is swooped off and transferred to the empty Martha Stewart's upper bunk cell..
Cheney is rushed off to the Veterans Hospital for Non-Servicemen in Germany with paramedics franticly trying to change the batteries on the fibulator..
Abe Foxman tries to melt in with the exiting crowd,but is apprehended and cuffed not once but twice...He is then slowly walked down the three flight of steps into the dark dungeons of the Basilica....He feels very comfortable.
Next weeks Proceedings will probably see
Foxman attempting to fight the good fight..without an attorney and getting annoyed at Gibson and Moore.
Cheney,if fit, will undoubtedly want to shed light on the bin Laden-Hussein-Al Quaeda connection and attempt to Justice-fly his fishing expedition with the American Constitution.
Putin illustrating how it is impossible to know someone by just looking into their eyes..Also waving warrants of arrest at Sharon for Yukos escapees.
Karl Rove and Michael Ledeen finding out how spin and smear has the tendency to go full circle...Karl is stumped by Sebastian on the question of integrity, honour and truthfulness..Foxman fears the same question will be thrown his way and cannot research his Talmud..no lights in Basilica basement.
Powell goes bananas recalling Tenet's innuendoes and constant prodding and Fred the guy from Wal-mart becomes Head of Security...Colin confesses he put Condi up to the 2008 Dual Presidency..after reading an 'article' about the Roman Emps MARCUS AURELIUS and LUCIUS VERUS(both known as Antoninus).
Maybe vertically and equally splitting the US down through the centre of Crawford, McLennan County, Texas and calling themselves "Stata Secretarius"..Who knows..Rummy maybe?
Coliconducus the Conquerer
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And much to come
Furthering the Monty Pythonic School of Education and Discussion.. Bringing drollery relief and satire to those that need a little smile or relaxation and not necessarily salvation after a hard days work..